A lot of us talk about freedom all the time, either to others, or to ourselves in our heads. Some are seeking freedom from the established norms and structures, some from their parents or partners, and some from the demons residing within their own selves. Not a day goes by, when I don’t question mine or someone else’s notions of freedom. So what is freedom to me? What is freedom to a teenage girl? Is it roaming around on the fearful New Delhi streets way past her curfew, or is it defeating the monstrous self-doubt buried in her chest to finally go learn something like bellydancing which sounds absolutely fascinating to the insides of her head? What is it that makes me, you, or anyone, free? For an atheist, freedom might amount to getting rid of religious role-playing in the name of taking care of other’s sentiments. For a writer, it may mean being able to write whatever comes to him/her instantly, as raw as it might be, without any prescribed objective in mind. For a poor person, freedom would mean being able to break free of financial constraints.

My idea of freedom, of real freedom, is not freedom from things, but realising that one is already free.I’ve realised that everyone here is a free soul, who will be loved and protected in their own way, but all we have to do is embrace the freedom within us rather than look for it outside. I do fight, I fight the world and rebel almost radically, to destroy the structures and norms existing since time immemorial, but I’m not dependent on breaking them, in order to feel free.

All I have right now are some acquired skills and my destructive (maybe constructive) doubts and my flawed self and beautiful dreams of what I want to become and how I want my life to be. But I’m not dependent on becoming or having any of those great things, in order to feel free. Whoever I am, with whatever I have, in this moment, this very moment, is free, absolutely free. Why should I keep running after something or the other all the time, why should I regret whatever was, and why should I live in hopes of a beautiful tomorrow? No I won’t. All I will do, is realise and remind myself, that, in this moment, I exist, and forevers are often not longer than a moment. If all of us, could just take a moment, and exist with everything we have, in this moment, we’d all not only be free but we will realise that we have always been. We have always been free.

People won’t believe in your dreams, they won’t believe in your belief. But you need to hold onto your freedom aggressively. You’ll be your own person and that will be your freedom.

This post is written as part of “Freedom Blog Train’ hosted by https://blogsikka.com and https://theotherbraininc.com.

I would like to thank Sinduja from www.mytinytigger.com for introducing me in her blog post. Over to Sabeeka from MomsMethods which is a destination for articles on adopting a healthy lifestyle using natural remedies. She believes – “Nature is bountiful and provides easy ways to heal and maintain a healthy lifestyle and momsmethods helps bring these to their readers.” . So head over to www.momsmethods.com to read her thoughts on freedom.

Until next time,

Lots of love

The post Your own sense of Freedom appeared first on Itika Singh.

Dear Greeting Card Writers:

Another Father’s Day is approaching and yet again, you leave me empty-handed. You see, my father does not have a flatulence problem. I’ve never seen him crack open a can of beer, and the remote control is more likely to be in the dog’s mouth than in his hand. My Dad is not the fix-it guy. He’s the guy who calls the fix-it guy ‘my chachu in my case’ . While I go through the usual search, I know I won’t find a card that is suitable for me to send to him and that is a shame, because I would like to express my gratitude. He has given me so much and amongst the many things I have to be thankful for are the life lessons that he has taught me. Here are just a few:

5. Don’t take life too seriously, you’ll never get out alive.

Having this perspective on life makes it all the more fun. Tell jokes. Do something crazy. Be silly. Finding the funny in everyday situations as well as sharing it with others is our way of living life to the fullest.

4. Just ask!

If you want something, ask for it. A simple thought, yet many of us, including myself, never ask for what we want. In most scenarios, the worst they can say is “No.”

3. If you’re not invited, invite yourself.

My father has always been a proponent of this philosophy and in many cases it has worked in his favor. While it may seem a bit pushy, and can sometimes come off as rude, often, it gets you to where you want to be. Your friends are going to an awesome concert. Hey, got an extra ticket? Someone mentions a fun house party they are going to. What time should I show up? Of course, I realize this advice has its limitations but it can lead to some really enjoyable experiences if used properly.

2. Don’t let others hold you back.

If there are things in life you want to do, do them regardless of if you can get someone else to come along. It’s a lesson in independence. Opportunities shouldn’t be forsaken because you can’t find a companion to join.

1. Try it, you’ll like it.

My father is open to new experiences and has shared this thirst for life with me. Often referring to food, he’ll say this catchphrase when anyone is hesitant. If you try it, you’ll like it (perhaps) but you’ll never know if you don’t try.

So you see, I need a greeting card that speaks to my father’s sense of adventure, his confidence, and his ability to go for what he wants in life. And I’m sure there are many more unrepresented fathers out there.

Sincerely,

Help A Daughter Out, Please?

This blog is a part of blog train hosted by Preety Tiwari of www.delhiblogger.com and Priyanka Lodha Patwari of www.flavorsofworld.com.

Thanks Ritika Kapoor for introducing me in your blog post on www.pearlsbyshakespeare.com for the blog train. Next in the blog train is Sneha. So head over to momandmusings.wordpress.com to read what her father helped her unlearn.

Until next time,

Lots of Love

The post 5 Indispensable Things My Father Taught Me About Getting Through Life appeared first on Itika Singh.

It’s true when they say the best things in life are free. In fact, the freest gift this life has to offer is often the most underrated & overlooked gift of all.

Time.

Have you ever opened a dictionary and actually looked up the definition of time? To my surprise the definition didn’t align with my original thoughts on time. Typically, we think of time as a measurement of minutes or hours, when in fact time is much more than a measurable thing.

Per the online dictionary:

“Time- the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future regarded as a whole.”

Without time, we wouldn’t be able to exist, we would just “be”. To exist is much more than a physical being. To exist is to progress throughout life and to constantly evolve as a being and to learn from our existence each day by taking into account that our time to exist will eventually run out.

I’ve come to realize with age that time only seems to speed up, rather than slow down or remain at a steady pace. The days that felt as if they lasted weeks go by in the blink of an eye. The vacations that seemed so long that you couldn’t wait to get back “home”, now never feel long enough.

See the thing about time is that it actually never slows down. It always remains constant. We cannot control time and the fact that we only have 86,400 seconds each passing day, but we can control how we use our time. We can control how much we exist, how much we evolve with time, and lastly how to stop waiting for the right time to take advantage of life’s most precious gift of all.

There is no “right time” to start existing. There is no “right time” to learn from our past to create better futures. Time is a continued progress; therefore, the right time is always in the now.

So, stop waiting for the “right time” to make a change. To tell someone how you feel. To start a new chapter. To spend more time with the ones that mean the most to you. Stop waiting for the right time to simply learn to appreciate the free gift we as humans have been given and often do not appreciate enough.

With each passing day, with each passing second, with no action to exist, you will let time slip through your hands faster than you can blink an eye and be stuck in the past or present.

After all, according to the dictionary time is not a measurable unit. Time is a continual process to create constant existence.

So, start existing. Start creating the right moments, rather than waiting for what you believe to be the right moments, because before you realize that there is no such thing as the “right time”, you will be indefinitely stuck living life just “being” in the present, rather than progressing towards the future.

You might not be able to control when the sun sets or rises, but you can control & learn to take advantage of the greatest and most free gift life has to offer,

Time.

Until next time,

Lots of love

This post is written for #ThePrimeWatches Blogtrain and sponsored by The Prime Watches. Thank you Wigglingpen for introducing me.

Next station in this blog train is Gleefulblogger .

Dipika is our Gleefulblogger who shares her candid thoughts on Lifestyle & Parenting.

A post graduate in Management, educator by interest and full time passionate blogger. An ex-banker by profession, she enjoys her new stay-at-home mom role with 5 yrs old daughter.

The post Time Is A Gift, So Make The Most Of It appeared first on Itika Singh.

AHOY!  Mate…

Today I am not sharing any look-book, any review of product or any DIY treatments.

Today, it is going to be different; today I am going to have a heart-to-heart conversation with you. Well! Gear up you for it is going to be a deep one.

When you’re flawed and paranoid about your surrounding it is difficult to be yourself.

You are being insecure because you aren’t perfect at all. 

I am writing this today because I have learnt ‘Nothing holds you back more than your own insecurities’.

So let me get done with it…

I started this blog because I can feel writing in my veins, because I love my work. No, like I’m literally obsessed with it. It’s like my morning cup of coffee I need to drink. I need to write to keep myself sane. My brain is chalking full of words and sentences and fragments always running and running.

I have to write at least once a day, to feel okay about myself and about my self esteem. I do it to share my thoughts. I do it because I love it. And I do it to try to help people out, and honestly to help myself out.

But recently I got really insecure about my follower count, my subscribers. In this race of bloggers where brands only collaborate with those who have followers in a two digit number & ‘k’ in the end, where your words don’t matter for all that matters is the number of comments & likes you get, I was losing myself. 

I forgot why in the first place I started out with this blog?

The more you get addicted to social media, the more life seems to be about expensive handbags, shiny cars and pretty faces. My blog was for those who seek an escape from this picture, for making fashion affordable, for genuine reviews so that you don’t invest in something that will be a waste for you, for giving positive vibes out a little here, a little there. But no, I was blindly running after brand collaborations not thinking that my quality of work would be affected by this.

Suddenly my words were not mine…. & That was the end for me. The end of that one thing I am so good at, the thing I love doing from the core of my heart, the thing that made me who I am today- MY BLOG.

That came as a red sign to me, sirens like that on an ambulance were ringing in my head. I knew something needs to be done. 

I just cannot work under someone constantly bossing around me or judging me, be it on my content or the followers I have.

I started the blog to be my own boss & somewhere down the lane I was losing it.

I started getting irritated all the time trying to please others. I could literally feel that entire big load on my head.

You might have observed I was not regular in between that is when I realized this ‘Don’t compare yourself to anyone. If you want to, compare yourself to you. You are your fiercest competition’.

Then I promised myself that I am not going to let myself sink down in this race of so called ‘perfect people’ & that day I won.

No one will ever help you to get rid of your endless fears and insecurities. But you, yourself is the one who can. Start loving yourself. Start accepting that you are flawed and realize that it is okay.

Insecurities are a pain. They limit us and they’re not something we can hide behind, or avoid. There needs to be a conscious choice to start moving forward and kick those insecurities out. Concentrating on your own insecurities is just going to take you to a place you never want to go to: depression, loneliness and fear.

Don’t let insecurities destroy you. Take charge of your own life.

Share your stories with me via a personal message on my Instagram page @colour_diva. I would love to help you out.

Until next time

Lots of Love

The post Never shrink again for anyone Darling! appeared first on Itika Singh.

Over the years we, the women of Indian society have been taught that periods are something to be hushed upon.

Sshhhh….

‘Don’t talk about this in front of your dad or brother or your male friends, they need not know about this’, are literally the first words a teen girl hears when she enters puberty. Periods have been, like a ‘dark secret corner’ for every female out there.

Recently some private companies in India have begun offering women paid menstrual leave, a development I feel might end up hurting women more than it helps.

To grant all women menstrual leave would buy into a stereotype that has existed for millennia- namely that menstruation renders women unfit to work, period.

It’s because of this history that I’m wary of returning to an argument that all females are crippled by menstruation-which is what menstruation leave implies to me.

With over 6 months of maternity leave & now a proposal for additional 12 days a year for period leave in a bid to make the workplace more women friendly. Are we taking a step back from women’s empowerment by alienating the workplace further from the woman?

While helpful to those who suffer severe pain- seems overall like a retrograde request, especially considering how far women have come without it. Plus, these kinds of policies threaten upon to undermine women’s long standing battle to discourage the notion that their natural cycle makes them weak in any way less able.

Another possible downside of the policy: employers could use it as the basis for bias. It could discourage businesses from hiring women. Employers could use menstrual leave for promotions or even offering women lower wages.

‘Hire a man instead; he’s guaranteed to not take that time off’

It suggests women are uniquely handicapped in the workplace by the fact that they have periods.

I am not saying that no one needs time off from work, many do. I know a lot of women (including me) go through hell during that time but there is always the scope of taking sick leave if some women feel they need it.

What can be done?

Women can be empowered to make positive decisions about their own health.

Period pain should not be trivialized or subject to stigmatization so 12 extra sick leaves can be added for women instead of calling it FPL.

Creating a comfortable work environment can help a lot.

We can encourage them & empower them& make sure a period ≠ stop.

picture courtesy @ishan__kapoor

until next time

lots of love

The post PERIOD≠STOP appeared first on Itika Singh.