AHOY!  Mate…

Today I am not sharing any look-book, any review of product or any DIY treatments.

Today, it is going to be different; today I am going to have a heart-to-heart conversation with you. Well! Gear up you for it is going to be a deep one.

When you’re flawed and paranoid about your surrounding it is difficult to be yourself.

You are being insecure because you aren’t perfect at all. 

I am writing this today because I have learnt ‘Nothing holds you back more than your own insecurities’.

So let me get done with it…

I started this blog because I can feel writing in my veins, because I love my work. No, like I’m literally obsessed with it. It’s like my morning cup of coffee I need to drink. I need to write to keep myself sane. My brain is chalking full of words and sentences and fragments always running and running.

I have to write at least once a day, to feel okay about myself and about my self esteem. I do it to share my thoughts. I do it because I love it. And I do it to try to help people out, and honestly to help myself out.

But recently I got really insecure about my follower count, my subscribers. In this race of bloggers where brands only collaborate with those who have followers in a two digit number & ‘k’ in the end, where your words don’t matter for all that matters is the number of comments & likes you get, I was losing myself. 

I forgot why in the first place I started out with this blog?

The more you get addicted to social media, the more life seems to be about expensive handbags, shiny cars and pretty faces. My blog was for those who seek an escape from this picture, for making fashion affordable, for genuine reviews so that you don’t invest in something that will be a waste for you, for giving positive vibes out a little here, a little there. But no, I was blindly running after brand collaborations not thinking that my quality of work would be affected by this.

Suddenly my words were not mine…. & That was the end for me. The end of that one thing I am so good at, the thing I love doing from the core of my heart, the thing that made me who I am today- MY BLOG.

That came as a red sign to me, sirens like that on an ambulance were ringing in my head. I knew something needs to be done. 

I just cannot work under someone constantly bossing around me or judging me, be it on my content or the followers I have.

I started the blog to be my own boss & somewhere down the lane I was losing it.

I started getting irritated all the time trying to please others. I could literally feel that entire big load on my head.

You might have observed I was not regular in between that is when I realized this ‘Don’t compare yourself to anyone. If you want to, compare yourself to you. You are your fiercest competition’.

Then I promised myself that I am not going to let myself sink down in this race of so called ‘perfect people’ & that day I won.

No one will ever help you to get rid of your endless fears and insecurities. But you, yourself is the one who can. Start loving yourself. Start accepting that you are flawed and realize that it is okay.

Insecurities are a pain. They limit us and they’re not something we can hide behind, or avoid. There needs to be a conscious choice to start moving forward and kick those insecurities out. Concentrating on your own insecurities is just going to take you to a place you never want to go to: depression, loneliness and fear.

Don’t let insecurities destroy you. Take charge of your own life.

Share your stories with me via a personal message on my Instagram page @colour_diva. I would love to help you out.

Until next time

Lots of Love

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